The Enemies List

 

Mark Donovan

 

"Don-Juan-ovan" has always been ultra smooth with the ladies.

Donovan with one of his many celebrity clients.  Shortly after this photo was taken, Donovan moved much of Jackson's portfolio into a large share of Etoys.

 

Mark Donovan. AKA The Irish Stallion.  Former investment broker for the Shortarmguy estate.  During 1999's bull run, Donovan's stock picking system vaulted him to prominence on Wall Street.   He was regularly quoted in leading financial publications such as Investor's Business Daily and served as a regular guest on CNBC's "Squawk Box".  He made headlines with bold predictions about internet stocks.  In February of 2000, he claimed that internet companies were "Way undervalued" and "they were just starting to make their move."  He wrote an article for Fortune Magazine stating that even though Amazon.com was trading at $400 a share, the price is "so low you could play handball with the curb."  To back up his statements, he convinced Shortarmguy and several of his largest clients to convert their portfolios into one hundred percent  internet stocks like Priceline and Pets.com.  He also started leveraging his own portfolio into the same positions before he was telling his clients to buy them, which happens to be quite illegal.  

After the dot com bubble burst, Mark was devastated.  His personal fortune was gone, he lost his job, and he soon found himself  under investigation by the SEC.  Friends he once had began to piss on him when he showed up at their doors.  He went crazy.  He packed up three suitcases full of guns, ammunition, and malt liquor.  He headed to his workplace.  

Luckily for Donovan's co-workers,  Shortarmguy was at their office for a meeting.  He'd felt bad that people besides himself had lost money and was making arrangements to help out Donovan's other clients financially.  When Donovan charged into the building, Shortarmguy wrestled him to the ground.  He disarmed Donovan and held him down until police arrived.  After the dust settled, Mark found himself in a jail cell staring at a 30 year prison sentence for assault with a deadly weapon.  He only served 6 months of his sentence at Oswald State Penitentiary.   

Luckily for Donovan, he used to be drinking buddies with Roger Clinton.   Roger still "owed him a favor" and in another pardon scandal,  President William Jefferson Clinton enabled Donovan to be a free man.  Mark is back out on the street.  He vows to reap vengeance against Shortarmguy for foiling his earlier plan.

 

Businessweek made Donovan famous when they published his claims that the Nasdaq would reach 10,000 by the Spring of 2001.  They also were the same publication that broke the story of his investigation by the SEC. 

During his 6 month stay in Oswald State Penitentiary, Donovan was very popular and made many friends!

 

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