I will put a new site on this page each week. This will be a site that either made me laugh my butt off, twisted my mind, or inspired me in some way. If I can't find a site like this each week, the link will probably lead to a bunch of naked chicks!!
December 31, 2004
Yahoo Video Search --- Yahoo has a new search engine dedicated to finding videos on the internet. Right now, if you do a search for classic comedy...a Shortarmguy comedy clip is the first item that pulls up!!! I always new Yahoo had good taste!!
Cassini-Huygens --- Nasa sent a probe to Saturn! On January, 2005, this little bad boy is going to try to reach the surface of Titan, Saturn's biggest moon!! It's going to then start sending back pictures of whatever it finds!! Titan is of great interest to scientists because it is the only moon in the solar system known to have clouds and a mysterious, thick, planet-like atmosphere. My guess is there's huge monsters there as well!!!!!
War With Canada --- Ann Coulter and Tucker Carlson are trying to start some crap with our neighbors to the North!
The Poop Report --- A Website Dedicated to Number Two Activities. A Friend of Shortarmguy asked me to link to the site a couple weeks back. I hadn't done so yet, so apparently I annoyed him as you can see from these posts here. Have I really been out of good material lately? I thought I was on a roll....oh well, here's some Poop Cartoons to make it up for all of you!!
Eye Test --- Men'sHealth.com Has A Very Nice Internet Eye Test
Monitor Cleaner --- (Nudity Warning!!) This site can help you clean the inside of the glass on your monitor. It's quite helpful!!
Cheerleader Toss --- This has to be a fake, doesn't it?
Fricking POPUP Ads --- Well, this is one way to take care of them!
December 19, 2004
The Price Is Right --- No-one in the history of The Price Is Right has ever been this excited to win the Showcase Showdown!!
Ugly Christmas Lights --- Be Thankful You Don't Live Across the Street from These People
ZoomQuilt --- An Online Acid Trip
Holiday Video --- Denis Leary sings It's A Merry F***** Christmas!
Charlie & The Chocolate Factory --- Johnny Depp Is Going To Be An Awesome Willy Wonka
--- This link is not for
everyone. It's pretty morbid, and it almost looks
December 12, 2004
Gigapixl --- Think you're pretty neat with your new 5.0 Megapixel Digital Camera? This site is dedicated to the production of photographs measured in Gigapixels!!! If you were to print one of these pictures, the paper would have to be at least 50 feet long!! They have a few examples and the level of detail is absolutely incredible!!
Harvard Sucks ---- This is a humorous site dedicated to a little stunt that some Yale students pulled off. They tricked the Harvard cheering section to hold up signs which said "We Suck!" Now that's funny!
Baby Queen --- They're pretty sad about their lack of diapers.
Bush Arrested --- Well, we have a winner for biggest story of 2005!
Slingshot Santa --- How far can you throw the fat man?
December 5, 2004
Voter IQ's --- Check out the US Election Results Listed By Average IQ!
Target Special --- It's so nice I can just buy this at Target now...
Hammerhead --- Check out the video of this 582 pound Hammerhead Shark caught only a few hundred yards away from where people were swimming!
Bull Rape --- Why you should never fight a horny bull!
Bad Coffee --- 1. CLICK ON THE LINK 2. PUT THE COIN IN THE VENDING MACHINE 3. CHOOSE YOUR DRINK 4. CLICK ON THE CUP WHEN IT IS READY 5. CLICK ON "APRI"
November 28, 2004
Virtual Bartender --- This is a beautiful thing! This lady bartender will do almost anything you ask her to do!! In the area where you place an order, try these commands: Kiss, Dance, Shirt, Tattoo, Banana, Orgasm, or whatever else comes through your imagination!!
Live-Shot --- If you get bored ordering around the fake bartender above, then you can sign up for this site which allows you to fire a real gun over the internet. Shoot at real targets on a Texas Ranch. Can you get prosecuted for murder if you kill someone with a gun fired from your home computer? It's bound to happen someday in our lives....
Daily Recycler --- Great Blog Site featuring current videos of interest. The most recent ones include George Bush having to save his bodyguard from some mean Chileans, Bill Clinton chastising Peter Jennings, and The Indiana Pacers Battling the Detroit Piston's fans. The last one is really cool because there's nothing better than seeing millionaires smack around average people.
Dubya --- The George W Bush Movie. Starring Don Knotts as Dubya.
Damien Rice --- This site features a music video with clips from the movie Closer. Wait long enough and you'll get to see Natalie Portman's butt in a thong!
November 21, 2004
Twangers --- And Children's Television Shows were never the same since...
Cameron Diaz --- (Nudity Warning!) IFilm is now hosting the infamous Cameron Diaz bondage Video. There IS Something About Mary!!!
The Spam Letters --- Hilarious Responses To SPAM Emails
Bert & Ernie Get Intimate --- Ernie Helps Bert Deal With Man Issues
Color Blind Test --- Handy Internet Based Eye Test
November 14, 2004
The Corner --- This Is A Great Political BLOG from the National Review. It definitely takes a conservative point of view on the issues, but I found it to be a great resource during the election. It kept me up to date with what was really happening better than the cable news channels did.
Who Did You Vote For? --- The Daily Show Conducts Exit Polls
NBC SCREENING ROOM --- Some great video clips from NBC. Be sure to check out the Triumph videos under the late night section!!
Psycho Elvis --- Imagine the King playing one of Hitchcock's Greatest. Now Imagine No More!
Move The Dot --- A Fun, but challenging little game!
Ashlee Simpson Show --- A spoof on the Ashlee Simpson Show. It's funny, but gets a little nasty at the end!
November 7, 2004
Election Rhapsody --- Everybody Wants To Be Jibjab!
Rawhide --- Bush Edwards Showdown
Mighty Mouse --- George Bush Does Andy Kaufmann
Big Fish --- Monster Sunfish Preparing Attack On New Zealand
October 31, 2004
Kerry Vs Bush --- (Nudity Warning!!!!) This site is having nice ladies send in naked pictures of themselves with campaign slogans written on their bodies! Now this is my kind of election!!!
Naked News --- (Nudity Warning!!!!) I guess as long as I'm linking to naked women, I might as well include this link I found on OtherCrap.com last week. This website actually shows you the Naked News Reports For Free!!! Enjoy it while it lasts!!!
John Edwards Loves His Hair --- A Nice Video Of John Edwards Grooming Himself
Give Bush A Brain Game --- Hours Of Fun Making Bush A Smart Man
Undecided --- Triumph Interviews Undecided Voters
October 24, 2004
Ballot --- The New Florida Electronic Election Ballot
The John Kerry Rap --- John Kerry Raps The Reasons You Should Vote For Him
Pentagon Attack Conspiracy --- Another Great Conspiracy Site Dedicated To The Pentagon Crash On 9/11. My Question Is, "If The Plane Didn't Crash Into The Pentagon, Where Did It Go?"
Cinnamon Girl --- I really dig this new video from Prince!!
Simpson House --- I want to live with the Simpsons!!!
October 17, 2004
JibJab.com --- The geniuses at JibJab are at again with a new election parody video titled "Good To Be In DC!" It's not as good as "This Land" was, but that one would be impossible to top. It's still pretty funny and definitely worth watching! Nice Buns, Edwards!!
Netlaughter --- Here's another humorous election music video called It's Time To Vote Once Again!
Fox News --- Bill Maher Bashed The Fair and Balanced Fox Network Coverage of the debate
Satan For Bush --- George Bush must be very happy that he has won the endorsement of Satan!
October 11, 2004
Gizmodo --- Hottest Gadget Site on the internet
Nude Survivor Photo Alert --- Warning!! Nakedness Alert!! The Playboy pictures of Survivor's Ami Cusack have shown up on the internet finally. Considering I've had nearly 1000 people discover Shortarmguy.com by searching for the nude photos of the current season's lesbian contestant, I felt obligated to post the link. If that link dies, you can also check this site.
Great Root Beer Ad --- Best Root Beer Ad Ever!
Message From God --- Snopes has discovered this great picture of a Message From God unveiled by Hurricane Charley.
October 3, 2004
CBS NEWS SLOGANS --- Top new Slogans for CBS News. I like # 5 which is "Ethics, Schmethics-- Bush Is a Jagwad and You Know It!"
Great White Shark Exhibit --- The Monterey Bay Aquarium has an actual Great White Shark in a tank for visitors to view!! It's a little one at only a bit over four feet long, but these guys will be making history if they can keep it in captivity for more than 16 days. I really hope they can do it!!
TATU FACED --- Remember TATU? Those hot little Russian Lesbian Pop Singers that I gushed about so much about a year ago? Turns out they're not really lesbians!! It was all just part of the act!! This is the most depressing news I've heard in months!!!!
Naked Survivor Alert --- I've had hundreds of people find my site in the past couple of weeks looking for naked pictures of Ami Cusack who is on the current episodes of Survivor. Apparently, she was featured in the 1996 issue of Playboy. I still haven't found any sites posting the photos for free, but Playboy is hyping their subscription service by offering new members a peek.
September 26, 2004
Brian Archer --- I always thought I was kind of unique! Then I receive an email from a guy who says he's a 1.62 armed comic and he's even been on Comedy Central! He's a professional comedian and has been touring for the past couple years. We've been doing quite a bit of trash talking back and forth. Brian is pretty confident his "Nub" would tear apart the Short Arms of Shortarmguy. I'm not so sure about that, but Brian's resume is quite impressive! Keep an eye out for this guy, because I'm sure he'll be coming soon to a comedy club near you!
Oprah Giveaway --- In honor of Oprah giving away all those cars to her studio audience, here's a video link to a great Saturday Night Live parody of Oprah's Favorite Things!!
Strangers On My Flight --- You are either with Frank or you're with the terrorists!
Declare Yourself --- Check out the PSA's to get people to register to vote...
September 19, 2004
Crossballs --- Check out the Crossballs video on POT-TV.NET! They have a debate between real experts and comedians posing as experts who use completely off the wall arguments to argue their case. This episode covers the hot topic of legalizing marijuana and it really is hilarious!!
Indecision 2004 --- Jon Stewart covers Zell Miller and Day 3 of the Republican National Convention. Good Humor!
We Are So Sorry --- A Muslim Group apologizes for terrorism and other atrocities done in the name of their religion. It's a very interesting statement. I especially like that they express a desire to help fight terrorism and the elements in their religion who preach hatred.
SNL Clips --- This site has a bunch of good Saturday Night Live video clips.
September 12, 2004
Tardster --- Shortarmguy finally was named to this list of notable Tards in the world. Check out my photo 4th row down and 3rd from the right. My mother is going to be so proud!!!
Funny Skeleton Video --- Street performers can be so cute!
Sedars.com --- Shortarmguy's old chum, Jason Alexander, has posted some really cool new photos to his website chronicling his recent adventures to Europe and China.
Don't Bug This Guy --- He really gets annoyed when you roll your mouse over his face!
RNC Protest --- I must admit, I really like this new nudity trend in protesting!!
September 6, 2004
American Idiot --- I'm sure the Bush Bashers love this song by Green Day
Grudge Match --- rednecks vs re....really special bowlers
Inverse Streaker --- There's something you don't see every day...
Nickelback --- Band busted for stealing....from themselves!
The World Meter --- Everyone, stop having sex!!!! This place is filling up too fast!!!
August 29, 2004
Sky Shots --- At first I didn't think there was much to this site, just a bunch of pictures taken from the sky. Then the music started playing and I really became mesmerized at how cool the world looks from way up there. Then I cried.
Angry Alien --- The movie Jaws in 30 seconds. Re-enacted by Bunnies.
We Fail -- The Creators Of This Website Were High When They Created This
Bravo Sitcom Show --- Who Wants To Help Write The Shortarmguy Show?
August 21, 2004
Kerry Loves Edwards --- This Video May Explain Their Support For Gay Marriage!
Dork VS Glass --- I can go to the store all by myself!
Russian Spaceship --- Scientists in The Soviet Union Are Claiming Evidence of an Alien Ship!
Build A Better Bush --- The presidential kind....
Dear Penis --- This is a pretty funny cartoon dedicated to a man's love of his penis.
Bravo: Situation Comedy --- Write a sitcom script and get the show produced by Bravo Television! Who wants to do a collaboration with Shortarmguy? I have some great ideas....
August 14, 2004
The Flip Flop --- This is a very interesting video put out out by the RNC showcasing John Kerry's various statements about Iraq before and after the "Howard Dean Effect".
Team America --- According to Drudge, the White House is pretty pissed off about this movie which they apparently feels makes light of terrorism and the threats we face. I don't know about that, but it looks pretty funny to me!
Mars Anomaly Research --- A website dedicated to finding weird stuff in the pictures from Mars!
Subservient President --- Make the President Do Whatever You Want!
Mike Tice --- Minnesota Vikings Fans will appreciate this commercial of Mike Tice Trying To Sing!
Space Shuttle --- A 360 degree view from inside the space shuttle
White House West --- Will Ferrell plays George W Bush in this "campaign video".
August 8, 2004
Mystery Animal --- New Pictures Emerge of the Maryland Mystery Beast
Shamu Gone Wild --- Video of a Killer Whale Going Nuts On His Trainer
Heroes --- Clerks Meets Marvel Comics
Gooooaaaalllllllll --- Nude Chicks Are Awesome At Soccer!
Doom 3 --- Doom 3 Looks Incredible! Click Link Below If You Want To Buy It!!
August 1, 2004
FARK.COM --- FARK.com is a big one! If you like crazy websites, this place has loads and loads of them. I've tried a couple times to get Shortarmguy.com listed as one of their links, but they just must not like me. It's too bad. My picture and a link to my site was posted on one of their message boards here and I literally had several hundred hits to my site within a couple of hours. How about a full link, Fark Folks???
Youngest Mother Ever --- This one is really creepy! Can you believe a little 5 year old girl gave birth?? It happened in 1939 and Snopes details the story. It even includes a photo of the girl near full-term!
Differences --- Try and see the differences between these two photos! It may take you awhile and it has the potential to really piss you off when you figure out the site's secret, so don't act like you weren't warned!!
Blondestar --- Blondestar Is The New Must Have Service For All Cars and Trucks!
Rock, Paper, SADDAM --- Play The Popular Children's Game With Mr. Hussein
RetroCRUSH --- A Flashback to the 1978 Sears Catalog
PumpinPistons --- Another FOS (Friend Of Shortarmguy) Website. This one is dedicated to Motor Sports Enthusiasts in New England. I'm sure I have at least several hundred New England Car Nuts hit my site every day!!
This Is A Great Book For Anyone Who Wants To Start An EBAY Business!!
July 25, 2004
JibJab --- The best political ad so far in 2004! It's a very catchy tune featuring George W Bush and John Kerry singing a most excellent rendition of This Land Is Your Land! The servers have been getting bogged down by the massive traffic being sent to this site, but keep trying because it's definitely worth watching!!
Albino Blacksheep --- A biting look into the Windows XP Operating System
Wimbledon and Napoleon Dynamite --- A couple trailers for some interesting movies
Amber Brkich --- Stuff Magazine's Nearly Naked Photo Spread of the Incredibly Sexy Survivor All Stars Winner, Amber Brkich
Kelly Ripa Loves Crack Cocaine --- I really began to love Kelly Ripa after seeing her in this hilarious Saturday Night Live Video
Serial Psychosis --- This is a site created by a Friend of Shortarmguy. It has some interesting poetry and funny pictures.
July 18, 2004
Sinbad --- I love to watch how celebrities act outside the public eye. It's always interesting to get a true glimpse of their real character. Yesterday, I met Sinbad. Sheri, Luke, Avery, and I sat right behind him in the empty first class section of our shared flight from Gulfport, Mississippi to Memphis, Tennessee. He was an incredibly cool guy and chatted politely with the flight attendants and all the different people who stopped to acknowledged him. He was especially kind to that weird crippled guy who kept pestering him while he was trying to read a magazine! I wish you Good Karma, Mr. bad, and the best of luck on whatever your next project might be!!
Saturn --- I want to work at NASA!!! They get to do such intriguing things. Stuff that really matters when it comes to the whole "What are we here for?" questions I love to ponder. Their latest big project is the Cassini-Huygens mission to study the planet Saturn. I want to go to Saturn!!!
Bad Day To Be A Pedestrian --- This video makes me too scared to walk down the street!!
Microsoft Honesty --- Even Microsoft admits that upgrading an old operating system to Windows XP can be a nauseating experience.
July 11, 2004
ACME Comedy Club --- Shortarmguy is going to humiliate himself at ACME's Contest to be "The Funniest Person In The Twin Cities". I'm sure I'll lose in the first round, but at least I will try to sneak in my video camera so I can post my performance on this website. That way, I can humiliate myself in front of the whole world!! Yayyyy!
Open Water --- The movie Jaws shaped my life. It made me grow up terrified of sharks, even though I lived in the Midwest. I always feared a breed of fresh water Great Whites just might show up one day while I was treading water in Clear Lake. The problem has been no-one has made a quality shark movie since. The sequels to Jaws stunk and movies like Deep Blue Sea just looked too fakey with their overly animated beasts! Open Water is a new movie coming out in August which is supposed to be pretty wild. Even the movie trailer scared the crap out of me, which is a very good sign!! Turn out the lights and turn up the volume before you watch it...
Bill Cosby --- Bill Cosby should run for President!! I would vote for him!! I'm so impressed by his actions lately. It's refreshing to hear a leader in the black community preaching personal responsibility instead of racial division!!! I grew up learning from the wisdom of The Cosby Show and think it would be very cool if he put his toes into the political pool. Here's another article discussing Tough Love From Dr.Huxtable!
July 4, 2004
Jenna Lewis Sex Tape --- Survivor's Jenna Lewis was married! She had sex on her wedding night! She thought it would be kind of kinky if she videotaped her and her husband doing the nasty in every way imaginable! Two days later, the tape somehow mysteriously leaked to a Pay Per View website.....how could that happen??? Would Jenna be willing to extend her 10 minutes of fame by becoming an amateur porn star? Hey, it worked for Paris Hilton...so why not! Hopefully, more reality stars will choose a similar course to stardom!!!
AESMA DAEVA --- Some buddies and I went to the legendary First Avenue Bar in downtown Minneapolis to heckle some professional wrestlers who performed there. We were having a blast and I worried for my life when I smarted off to a smaller Latino wrestler who was built like a brick-shit house! I yelled "I've never seen midget sumo wrestling before!" He stopped what he was doing and looked right at me, pointing with a glare of venomous anger. Then he pretended to kick the other man's ass with studly pro wrestling moves. I quit heckling after that. Then the neat thing happened. There was a break from wrestling and this band came out to sing a song on the stage. They were like a mix of heavy metal and opera singing. At first, it wasn't working for me, but soon I found myself mesmerized by the glorious beauty who was belting out the vocals. She was backed up by some accomplished musicians playing electric guitars and a violin! It was quite intriguing and I look forward to going to see this band do a complete performance!
Catfish Baller --- What To Do If You Find A Catfish stuck to a basketball.
Gay Test --- Lucky for me this test showed me to be straight...
June 27, 2004
Special Ed --- My beloved co-workers have been mocking me with the Special Ed voice for years! After all, if a guy has funny arms, he must talk this way!! The funny thing about Special Ed, though, is that his language is addictive! See if you can watch this video and not say the phrase "I got mail!" at least once in the 24 hours!! This site has a bunch of other Crank Yankers videos as well!!
The Shining --- The Shining is one of the best horror movies of all time! I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to see it re-enacted in 30 seconds using nothing but cartoon bunnies. Well, now my dreams have been answered!!!
Grouchy Media --- This site has a bunch of military music videos. Rock out!!
Heads, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes --- This one is a little twisted so be careful!
June 20, 2004
The Filthy Critic --- This website reviews movies using naughty words and adult metaphors. It seems I agree with the majority of his comments, especially when it came to the lame movie, The Day After Tomorrow.
Exorcist: The Beginning --- I think the original Exorcist is still the scariest movie ever made. I'm not sure how good this sequel will be, but the web site gets me all creeped out which is a good sign for the film!
KittyRoo --- An unidentified animal is stalking people in North Carolina. Looks like a Kangaroo screwed a cat to me!
Bush Soundboard --- Some Classic Utterances From Our Commander In Chief
June 13, 2004
Ronald Reagan --- He Was A Great President and a Great Man.
Hans-Werner Sahm --- A Couple Cool Flash Pieces Featuring A Variety Of Paintings From Shortarmguy's Favorite Artist. More Pictures Of Sahm's Work Can Be Found Here. I Just Love How He Uses Sunlight To Show Off His Fantastic Worlds!
Sustainable Oil --- There's a Theory Floating Around The Internet That The Planet May Have Much, Much More Oil Than We Currently Think It Has. As A Matter Of Fact, Earth May Be Constantly Producing It. Interesting Concept, but I'm sure it will be Discredited. Too Many People Profit From The Idea That It's A Rapidly Declining Resource.
Truth In Advertising --- Or How To Make It Big In Television Commercials!
SpideyF2 --- John is an old friend of Shortarmguy.com. SpideyF2 is his website. He has some fun stuff on there and you especially need to check out his Laconia 2001 Pictures. Is it just me or are girls much more ready to Flash their boobies on camera than they were 10 years ago?
RiverSongs --- A Nice Little Pick Me Up Puzzle
June 6, 2004
Elementary 911 --- An intriguing conspiracy web site regarding the airplane crashed into the Pentagon. I'd be curious to see a skeptic site refute some of their claims....
Zipperfish --- Troy's Top 10 Celebrity Nipple Slips
The New ABC's --- More boobs. This time in a song format.
The Little Drummer Boy --- Come They Told Me. Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum.
Virtual Bubble Wrap --- Go Crazy In Manic Mode!
May 30, 2004
Olowokandi --- Minnesota Timberwolves fans will appreciate KFAN's tribute to Michael Olowokandi
Al Qaeda Training Video --- This looks like it's a few years old, but it's pretty comical.
Britney's Subliminal Message --- So that's what she's been saying to me....no wonder I'm such a fan!
Great Multimedia Clips --- This Czabe guy has some pretty funny stuff....
FindVideos.com --- Watch Music Videos For Free Online
May 22, 2004
UFO Sighting --- The Mexican Air Force Captured Video of a Bunch of UFO's! That is so bizarre!!!! I didn't know Mexico had an air force!?!?!
Andy Kaufman --- Andy Kaufman once said that if he were ever to fake his own death, he'd wait for 20 years before revealing himself. Well, that date is rapidly approaching and his friends are organizing a party to greet him!
Annoying Girl --- How to deal with a loud-mouth co-worker...
Chris Rock --- How To Not Get Your Ass Kicked By The Police
Honda Accord --- This video is simply amazing! Supposedly this is all real and not computer editing tricks. Everything you see in the film is parts from two Honda Accords. Apparently it took 606 takes until they were able to get it to work through the end...
May 15, 2004
Other Crap --- This site continues to come up with amazing links from around the web!
Yeti Sports --- There's a new Penguin Game to play! How far can you make them fly?
Seinfeld & Superman --- Great new internet commercials featuring Seinfeld and Superman
Nice-Tits --- A selection of beautiful pictures of tits!
Now Hear This --- Trivia Questions from the weird sounds guy from the Police Academy movies
May 9, 2004
What The Bleep Do We Know? --- This movie looks incredible! It follows Alice down the Rabbit Hole through the boundaries of quantum physics through the edges of reality, past spirituality and back through the surface of Science.
Ebay Wedding Dress --- This guy sells his ex-wife's wedding dress for over $3000, gets on the Today show, receives 5 wedding proposals, and has his entire life probed by the media. I really love the internet.
Ifilm Viral Videos --- George W Bush Picking His Nose!
Noah's Ark Expedition --- They're going to find Noah's Ark. Is Indiana Jones helping?
Star Wars Kid Vs Bill --- Who has a better chance at Killing Bill than the Star Wars Kid?
May 2, 2004
Slap Omarosa --- I'm not really into promoting violence against women, but Omarosa from the Apprentice is just begging to have an exception made for her.
Apprentice Women Nude --- The rest of the Apprentice women were kind enough to pose nearly naked for FHM. Thank you, ladies.
IBC Root Beer Primate --- One of the reasons why root beer is better than regular beer
4 x 4 --- The future of SUV's
Clock/Calendar --- This is a nifty way to keep track of the time.
Chiseen --- All right, you wear a shirt with a target on it while I shoot a bunch of fireworks at you. Deal?
April 25, 2004
One Legged Dancing Machine --- This guy fits right in at Shortarmguy.com
Bombardier Embrio --- This ultra-cool Gyroscope ride called Embrio will be available from Bombardier in 2025.
Camel Spiders --- A bunch of people found Shortarmguy.com this week searching for information on the mysterious Camel Spider which supposedly jumps up to eat a camel's stomach until it's intestines fall out. Here's the straight dope on that topic!
Britney Concert --- My old buddy, Dave Ryan at KDWB, is concerned for you parents who want to take your 11 year old daughters to the new Britney concert. These pictures show you might be a little uncomfortable during the show. The pictures show me that my pants may be a little uncomfortable during the show.
Davinci Code --- I just finished reading the book The DaVinci Code By Dan Brown. Pretty Intriguing stuff! There's a bunch of interesting conspiracy theories involving the Catholic Church, The Holy Grail, St Mary Magdalene and Jesus Christ. I don't want to spoil any plot points for those of you who still might want to read it, but here's a site that debunks most of it: Crisis Magazine. If you want to buy this book, here's a link to Amazon.
April 17, 2004
Fund Race --- See which candidate for president your neighbor is bankrolling. You can search by name or address. Now you know who's houses to fill their trees with Toilet Paper this summer. Isn't that convenient?
Subservient Chicken --- Command this chicken to do whatever you want! Tell him to juggle, he'll do it. Tell him to jump, he'll do it. Tell him to jerk off, he'll do it. This chicken will do anything you want!! It's like a dream come true.
Aerogel --- Krazy Kory sent me this link detailing this information about a wonderful new material called Aerogel which was developed by NASA. This substance is 99.8% air, it provides 39 times more insulating than the best fiberglass insulation, is 1,000 times less dense than glass, and was used on the Mars Pathfinder rover. Krazy Kory is claiming he's starting a new business selling pipes made out of Aerogel. Good luck in your endeavor, Krazy Kory.
Get Girls.com --- How to use a hand puppet to meet, attract, and date tons of single women...Judging from how this guy looks in his photo, he really must know what he's talking about when it comes to picking up women.
April 10, 2004
Skycar --- This guy is building a flying car. Who will be the first to get a DWI in one?
Thong Song --- These rap videos always feature the sexiest creatures shaking their booty!
Darren Barefoot --- A tutorial explaining how to conceal explosives inside a dead rat. That ought to come in handy some time!
Freaking News --- A great news site for freaks like me!
Bored of Bush --- Who doesn't want to fall asleep at a campaign rally?
April 2, 2004
Video Game Porn --- Accidental Porn Images From Classic Video Games
Townhall --- Interesting Theories About Why They Hate Us
8 Queens --- Krazy Kory sent this. He solved it and I didn't. He was so proud. He needed the Pick-Me-Up since I crushed his score of 133 on the Emode Test!
On-line Dating --- Hilarious On-Line Dating Tips From The Onion
March 27, 2004
Apprentice Candidate --- As you can see from this week's multimedia clips, Shortarmguy applied to be in the upcoming second season of The Apprentice. After sending my tape in to the producers, I found this website of another potential candidate. It looks like I'm going to have to work a little bit harder on my video for season 3.
Gawker.Com --- I've been a gawker my whole life! This site gives you the inside scoop on a whole bunch of interesting little tidbits.
Handicapped Pets --- A site dedicated to crippled animals. They should have called it ShortPawDog.com.
Princess --- Warning! This link is to an X-Rated Cartoon. An absolutely hilarious X-Rated cartoon developed by the creators of South Park, Matt Stone and Trey Parker. Apparently, this was supposed to be a new animated series for Shockwave.com, but never happened because it was too dirty! I'm going to be singing the Princess theme song all weekend now that I've heard it!!
March 20, 2004
Robot Legs --- I want a pair of robot legs!!! And a long robot arm too!
Bush Just Wants To Have Fun --- A cool video made out of the Bush as a girl photos!!
The Dirt Road --- The ins and outs of anal sex
Mystere --- I was in Vegas this week for work and had the chance to see this show. Pretty damn surreal. They need Shortarmguy in there, though.
Favorite Swear Words --- What is your favorite swear word?
March 14, 2004
Passion Of Christ --- The Passion of Christ was a very powerful movie. I'm not sure I can call it a great movie, because it was so hard to watch. Basically it's a two hour tale of a man being tortured and then crucified. Under any other circumstances, I couldn't watch a film like this and walk out feeling good about it. But I was so drawn in...so mesmerized....I was speechless by the time the closing credits rolled. This portrayal made me thirst for more information about these people, their motivations and their interactions with Jesus. It's a film which illustrates the stories of Jesus and educates people like myself who have a difficult time receiving these same messages by reading the bible. I could appreciate where some of the charges of anti-semitism would be drawn from this movie, but I don't think it should have been made any other way. This is one interpretation of events that happened over 2000 years ago. In any case, I certainly didn't walk out of the theater holding any animosity towards the Jewish people. Jesus Himself prayed for forgiveness of His persecutors for they know not what they do. When I walked out of the theater, all I wanted was more information. More details. So I did a Google search and found this website.
US Department of Justice --- Somebody from the US Department Of Justice has visited Shortarmguy.com many times over the past few weeks. Please tell me you're a friend and not a foe. I have enough foes in my life already.
Salad Topping --- Some lady found a fingertip in her salad. That's a little unappetizing.
The Singshons --- The hottest new television show in the Middle East
Boobie Trails --- (Nudity Warning) Best use of my mouse in years!
The Tragic Death Of Luigi --- Mario's Sad Story
March 6, 2004
My Son Peter --- If this site is real, it's extremely disturbing. Supposedly, the author of the site lost his wife and young son in a tragic accident. Six days later, his dead Son, Peter, began visiting him again. The stories, photos and video create a very creepy website!
Airplane Near Miss --- The dangerous life of a reporter on the scene at an airfield.
The Baby Arm --- The Baby Arm Poll. It's a very odd thing when my arms are discussed on the internet. It's even odder when polls are drawn up to find out whether people should fear my arms or embrace them. Thank God that at the time of this writing 46% of respondents voted to embrace them!! 26% were just confused by the whole idea.
February 29, 2004
The Other 23 Days --- Shortarmguy's Old Friend, Dav Kaufman, is still busy at work producing his movie, Lake Desire, in which Shortarmguy has been promised a part. He's looking for a completion date of somewhere in 2005. In the meantime, Mr Kaufman has started his own publishing company called Crotalus Publishing on the back of Lake Desire's success. Their latest title is from humorist Karen Laven and delves into the age old issue of what are some alternative uses for feminine hygiene products. It's a great bathroom read for sure!
Passion Of The Christ --- In case you've been living in a cave and haven't heard about this provocative movie from Mel Gibson, the website carries many of the images which will surely make this one of the most memorable films I've ever seen.
Penguin Smash --- A fun little game where you get to control the abominable snowman smacking penguins with a big club!
William Hung 2 --- William Hung is hot!! I've had over 1000 new people visit Shortarmguy the past couple of weeks looking for his videos! This link features a bunch of his videos including his American Idol Audition and an Open Mic Night at UC Berkley. There's also the video of Jimmy Fallon impersonating Big Will. I'm repeating this link until Google stops sending me so much traffic from the multitude of screaming William Hung fans!
February 21, 2004
Ebay Auction --- I received this link in the following email:
What is going on here? Seems like ever since that girl succeeded in selling her virginity on ebay, everyone wants in on the euphemistic prostitution. This guy is cute, addresses the old 'you're so emotionally immature you desperately need to feel needed' card head-on, and possesses that been-through-hell-until-I-honestly-don't-give-a-fuck-anymore charisma, which is quite attractive, as your wife would no doubt agree. But he's still such a typical bastard!
An occasional enjoyer of your site, Pajamasaur
William Hung 2 --- William Hung is hot!! I had 750 new people visit Shortarmguy this week looking for his videos! This link features a bunch of his videos including his American Idol Audition and an Open Mic Night at UC Berkley. There's also the video of Jimmy Fallon impersonating Big Will. I'm also repeating the below link so Google sends more people my way for another week!
William Hung --- I love American Idol. Everybody wants to be a star. This show proves that no matter how much of a goof you are, if you give your heart and soul to an endeavor, you can be a star. William Hung is a young Asian Gentleman with no professional musical training, but man does this kid have charisma! Be sure to check out the video clip of William's audition. It is addictive! The more you watch it, the more you scream for more, more, more!!!
Bad Teachers --- These bad teachers are exploiting this kid who has funny ears. My teachers used to do this crap to me all the time. They'd lift me up in front of the class-room just to have the other kids laugh at me. They couldn't keep the students attention without me.
February 15, 2004
William Hung --- I love American Idol. Everybody wants to be a star. This show proves that no matter how much of a goof you are, if you give your heart and soul to an endeavor, you can be a star. William Hung is a young Asian Gentleman with no professional musical training, but man does this kid have charisma! Be sure to check out the video clip of William's audition. It is addictive! The more you watch it, the more you scream for more, more, more!!!
Eye of God --- According to our good friends at Snopes, this is an actual photograph taken by the Hubble Space Telescope of the Helix Nebula. The picture's "Eye of God" appellation appears to have been a title coined by an admirer of the photo due to the nebula's resemblance to a human eye, not something designated by NASA. It kind of gives me a peaceful feeling!!!
The Bushinator --- Finally there's proof that George W Bush isn't human!
Comic Book Movie --- This is an intriguing promotional video for Comic Book The Movie. Paris Hilton would be so proud!!
February 5, 2004
MSN Video --- I'm hooked on MSN's new video news service! You select from a variety of news stories pulled from sources like NBC, CNBC, MSNBC, ESPN, and much more. I watched Dennis Miller highlights, movie trailers, Triumph The Insult Comic Dog's Weather Report, the Oscar Nominations, and much more this week. It's like TIVO for your PC and it's free!!!!
Top Nude Scenes For 2003 --- This site features photos from the Top 15 Nude Scenes from 2003! How could you not love a site like that!!!!
Escape From Neverland --- This link was sent to Shortarmguy from one of his fans at MTV! Help Michael Jackson stop boys from leaving his compound!!
MikeRoweSoft.com --- Mike Rowe is being attacked by Microsoft for a silly domain name. Hey, Microsoft! If your customers are that easily confused that this website might cause you damage, you have a bunch more to worry about than Linux! Read the kid's story HERE. See his Ebay Auction HERE.
February 1, 2004
Howard Dean Songs --- So Howard Dean loses in the Iowa Caucus and goes Crazy. I'm sure everybody has seen the video, but in case you haven't, Yahoo is still hosting it here. So I heard a couple funny songs that people had created sampling from the Dean Scream. I wanted to find them on the web so I could link to them this week, but found something much funnier. Apparently there's a whole bunch of Howard Dean songs out there.
Ben and True Majority --- This site features Ben from Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream giving a math dissertation about Oreo Cookies and the federal budget. It's all so clear to me now. Thanks, Ben. Everybody has a political opinion and it seems like everyone famous hates George W Bush. I'm sorry, but when I get to be famous I'm still going to like our president.
Winter Carnival --- When it gets really cold in Minnesota, we like to do nutty things like build Ice Castles. This year's version looks very cool. (Get it? Cool??) Shortarmguy's co-worker, Travis, took some incredible photos of the structure and they're hosted on Shortarmguy's Stalker Steve "CUDS" Cuddihy's website.
Cruel --- Last week I linked to a bunch of sites where people were discussing me. I had to include this one this weekend because it really made me laugh. The discussion starts with a link to my site and the guy says Cripples Are Cool. Then a couple posts later, someone posts the following hilarious entry:
There was this guy when I went to college (the first time anyway) that had some birth defect that caused his arms to be much smaller than the rest of his body. The dude looked like a fucking T-Rex, he was one of the biggest and most complete pricks that I have ever met in my life. But I digress, anyway imagine a guy with 12 inch arms named, Tom Stubs.
I guess with a double "god must hate me" hit like that, I'd be a dick too.
January 25, 2004
Shortarmguy was featured this week on GordonKeith.com
The website must be pretty popular since he sent me thousands of new visitors over the course of the past few days. I've gathered that Gordon is a radio personality on The Ticket in Dallas. For some reason, he seems to have an obsession with BabyArms. I sent him an email thanking him for the traffic, but have received no response to date.
It's always interesting when Shortarmguy.com gets a bunch of traffic, because I inevitably get bashed by dozens of anonymous people all over the internet. Although sometimes it's difficult to read people tearing into me, I recognize that there's no such thing as bad press. The mission of Shortarmguy.com is to get Todd Swank famous. Just because my arms look different, doesn't mean I can't accomplish great things. It doesn't mean I can't be a rockstar....or a movie star...or a famous comedian. Some day, I hope my accomplishments will help to inspire others to not take their own "handicaps" so seriously. You can read more details about my mission on my Legend Page.
So on my climb to fame, I guess I'll just have to put up with the critics who want to tear me down. Here's some of the best from the past week:
Fucked Company --- From the Dotcom Bubble Bursting Website, Fucked Company, comes this discussion which opens positively since the original poster states "I bet this guy gets mad pussy." Not too much bashing except somebody says I look like slugs on toast.
Cell-Block --- This site gets a little bit uglier. I'm called odd, said my brains must be the size of a baby's as well, and there's a suspected photo of me as a child.
Dallas Imports --- The posters on this site seem pretty clever. They make the reference to Finding Nemo which was really based on my life story and call me funny which I always enjoy! They also came up with the most relevant video link which features a guy with arms like mine who is a Kung Fu Master!! That video kind of inspired me to take up martial arts!
Dogbomb --- Although this discussion didn't place in the past week, I think it's the best internet discussion about me and my website to date. It's from an English website which asked me to be interviewed for a story. The site author asked his visitors to develop a list of questions for me and here's what they came up with....For some reason, they never followed through with the interview!!
January 18, 2004
Bush In 30 Seconds --- Although I don't really agree with the message in most of these videos, I do admire the creative presentations. Republicans need to get organized to develop a proper response!
Spirit Rover --- I'm hooked on The Mars Rover Missions! How cool is it that we have a robot millions of miles away on a distant planet snapping pictures for us? Bush is supposedly going to announce a manned mission to Mars this week! I volunteer to go!!!! The world needs a crippled guy in Space!!!!
Mystery Of Oak Island --- I spotted a very interesting article in Rolling Stone Magazine regarding this mystery which has cost 6 lives and numerous fortunes. There's an island off the coast of Canada which supposedly has a buried treasure which people have been searching for over 200 years! The Rolling Stone article isn't online, but I was able to find this website which gives a pretty detailed account regarding the subject. Come on Bush, if you won't send me to Mars then send me to Oak Island! The World needs a crippled guy in the money pit!
Metrosexual Quiz --- There's been much fighting in Shortarmguy's Office this week regarding who's a Metrosexual and who's not. Take this quiz and you can find out which way you lean. Shortarmguy scored a 16 which means he's a strong candidate for Metrosexuality.
January 11, 2004
Best Websites Of 2003
Hunting For Bambi --- Some goofballs create a game in Las Vegas where men hunt for naked women with Paintball Guns and a whirlwind of controversy follows them. See videos of local coverage here. Our good friends at Snopes think it may just all be a big set-up. Once again, all of America gets Punk'd!!
Time To Bomb Saddam --- This site on the other hand is pretty clear what they think the answer is.
Butt Shake --- Hours of fun are contained on this website! Take your mouse and select an area of the butt. Drag it fast or drag it slow and make that booty go, go, go!!
The Shortarmguy Store --- Loads of cool products for people who aren't afraid to express themselves. Lunchboxes, thong underwear, ski caps, teddy bears, greeting cards and more. All emblazoned with the image of a crazy cripple. We'll be putting Wal-mart out of business in less than a year.
January 4, 2004
Modern Drunkard Magazine --- A website dedicated to becoming and being the best drunk you can be. Make sure to check out 365 reasons to get soused, bar signs, and the motivation posters. Makes me feel like having a beer or seven right now.
Snowglobe --- What a happy scene! It's a beautiful winter day in a snow-globe!! People are skiing, skating, and having fun in the snow! A jolly song is playing! Now shake them up!!!!
Vintage Bush Shots --- The creator of this website likes to superimpose George W Bush's face on vintage girlie pictures. Nothing wrong with that!
Link to 2003 Favorite Links
Link to 2002 Favorite Links
Link to 2001 Favorite Links
Who Is This Girl???
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Watch What Happens To Her.
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