Shortarmguy's Crazy Emails

On this page, I will post the funniest emails I receive on any given day.  So email shortarmguy@aol.com the best stuff you get.  I'll only post the cream of the crop and not the other crap I get.  Although I didn't create the items on this list, my feeling is that they're in the public domain since they were emailed to me with 600 other people.  So no more damn copyright lawsuits! 

Warning!  Adult Material Below!

 

March 26, 2005

I have a client that said he bought a new mouse for his computer and now his
printer won't work; he says the mouse caused a printer jam.

Damn!  That Shortarmguy Sure Is Funny!

I'll Race Ya

I love Car Shopping with kids!

Easy Stretches You Can Do While Working At Your Desk!

Ohhhhhhh, I think I ate too much kitty!

Fun With Forklifts!

This photo was sent to Shortarmguy this week from a nice lady along with several other silly pictures.  She captioned this photo of her daughter as follows:

 "Why we'll never let our friend Greg baby-sit again!"  

It was a joke, so no angry emails!!!

March 20, 2005

Honey, You Just Don't Seem Quite Into This Tonight...

Listen to me if you want to improve the Horse Power on this bad boy...

Exhibit 1 in the Michael Jackson Trial

Yes, Mrs. Bush, this does come in a Strap On version... 

Either Phil Mickelson just missed a Game Saving Putt or he's found new love...

And the Renaissance Festival never had an unattended child again...

For the last time, shut your damned mouth!!

Yeah, right!  Like some sign is going to stop me from crapping on your lawn!

Jeez, Nike did you have to tell everyone?

I've been nervous about my wife since she bought this new knife holder...

March 13, 2005

Please, nobody ever tell me that they grew up in a rough neighborhood.  Can you imagine growing up in this part of Nigeria where the pets are hyenas?  Yeah, you can bring your Pit Bull or Rottweiller if you want, but I think your dog will get Punk'd right there on the spot!   This is probably a Nigerian gang (notice the arm bands) rolling through the hood.  Check out the home made muzzle!  And are they being walked with truck chains?

This is a side of Clay Aiken I never thought I'd see!

Anne is a frequent contributor to Shortarmguy.com.  She sent this story along with the following amazing picture of a tornado!
 
OK, The story that I got is that my friend has a friend that use to work for him and was
always taking risks in life (a forty-two year old Guy who now lives in Kansas and ..Get this, actually chases tornado's as his biggest hobby in life. Whew!! When he is not chasing them he is being chased by one. He takes pictures of them and at my friends request sent a picture. My friend said when I ask" can you get in touch with him"? He laughed and said "only if you know where the next devastating treacherous storm is...you would most likely find him there. This last one kept him down for a month or so because the tornado caused a piece of wood to fracture his jaw........ok....maybe this guy is nut's but he is off chasing the""as I hear it" mother natures many wrath's.
 
So that's all I could get. I do think I will try and find out where he is and get some more news.
That's Wild!  But Who knows LOL ...I just forward them.
Anne
PS..OH YES THE GUY WAS A TOP SALES PERSON.  You know how those salespeople are....LOL... they never give up!!??"""!!
 
 
Maybe We Could Garnish The Slot Machine?
 

What happens when you swallow a Pumpkin Seed!

Anna Nicole Redefines the word Class at the Australian MTV Video Awards!

For some reason, Puppies just kept coming out of the poor girl's mouth...

Sojan, the creator of Cbrains.com, has been working on some new logos and T-shirt designs for Shortarmguy.  We're not ready to launch them yet, but I enjoyed the early drafts so much I thought I'd give a sneak peek at what's to come!

March 6, 2005

Some incredible new photos were found of the tsunami.  Unfortunately, the photographer isn't around to capitalize on them!  Story can be read here. 

Dining Room set for sale

This is an actual photo that was put in the classified ads for someone selling a dining room set.

There's a pretty strong clue in here suggesting that it was taken by a man.

Sharpen your powers of observation and try to find the clue.

Good luck.   Keep looking!!

Letter To Dr Ruth

Ads You Just Won't See In Real Life!

Why it's not always fun to have the window seat on an airplane!

Baby's Best Friend

I've Heard Of Hot Dogs....

Redneck Puppy

Crazy Email Archives

February, 2005

January, 2005

December, 2004

November, 2004

October, 2004

September, 2004

August, 2004

July, 2004

June, 2004

May, 2004

April, 2004

March, 2004

February, 2004

January, 2004

December, 2003

November, 2003

October, 2003

September, 2003

August, 2003

July, 2003

June, 2003

May, 2003

April, 2003

March, 2003

February, 2003

January, 2003

December, 2002

November, 2002

October, 2002

September, 2002

August, 2002

July, 2002

June, 2002

May, 2002

April, 2002

March, 2002

February, 2002

January, 2002

December, 2001

November, 2001

October, 2001

September, 2001

July, 2001

June, 2001

May, 2001

April, 2001

March, 2001

February, 2001

January, 2001


Free counters provided by Honesty.com.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
The Legend of ShortArmGuy
ShortArmGuy Photos
ShortArmGuy's Comedy Act
ShortArmGuy's Multimedia Bits
ShortArmGuy's Enemies List
ShortArmGuy's Crazy Emails
ShortArmGuy's Favorite Websites
ShortArmGuy's Inspirations
ShortArmGuy Commentary

ShortArmGuy Home

Feedback for me?

Suggestions for site improvements?

Funny jokes, audio files, video files that I can post here?

Links to inspirational sites?

Naked pictures of yourself or your girlfriend?

Email me at shortarmguy@aol.com.

Copyright 2005 by Swank! Productions --- All rights reserved