Legend of ShortArmGuy
Shortarmguy's Crazy Emails
Crazy Emails For March
How to drink for free all
Quote of the Week
"You just don’t luck
into things as much as you’d like to think you do. You build step by step,
whether it’s friendships or opportunities."
– Barbara Bush, first
Joke of the Week
An old-time southern, hell fire & brimstone country preacher had a
teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought
to choosing a profession.
Like many young men,
the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem
too concerned about it.
One day, while the
boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He
went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects:
- a Bible,
- a silver dollar
- a bottle of whisky
- a Playboy magazine
"I'll just hide
behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "when he comes
home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up.
If it's the Bible,
he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would
If he picks up the
dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too.
But if he picks up
the bottle, he's going to be a no-good, low down drunkard, and, Lord,
help me.... what a shame that would be.
And worst of all, if
he picks up that magazine he's gonna be a skirt-chasin', no good bum."
The old man waited
anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house
whistling and headed for his room. The boy tossed his books on the
bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the
table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.
Finally, he picked up
the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar
and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big
drink while he admired this month's Centerfold.